im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
