using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize
