I feel like I'm in dance class right now
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
