Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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