She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
