you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
false alarm. still invincible.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Randomize
