Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize