PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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