I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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