A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Is this like a preordered booty call?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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