You really coming over, don't trick.
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I accidentally had phone sex last night
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
