we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
