you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
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