We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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