I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
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