Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize