There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
