I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
