Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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