you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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