we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
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