she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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