Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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