My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize