I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
