So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize