Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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