My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
