So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
