Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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