My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
well you can't waste a boner
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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