The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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