Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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