but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize