I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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