Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
