I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize