Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
