batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
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