You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
