VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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