Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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