And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
