i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
