Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Randomize