google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize