i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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