its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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