better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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