If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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