plz talk dirty to me
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
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