chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
